[dead letters] 18 dec 2000

[Pencil on page torn from college-ruled spiral notebook.]

Dear Friend,

The glorious spell is broken, as is my heart… I think. Bitch Jeannine* ruins my fucking love life again, and everyone’s happy. I do not blame him. He has done nothing wrong. It is she who has once again brought my love life to a screeching halt.

How could she do this? He could she do it? I must blame her, and her alone for my misfortunes. It doesn’t seem fair, you say? Why, my heart being broken isn’t fair either! I love him, plain and simple. I hope the bitch learns to accept that. Jealousy is no reason to hurt me.

My heart bleeds now. I hate being laid open like this, vulnerable to any attack. Why do I grieve when I don’t know for sure what will be? Must a petty schoolgirl destroy what the Lady has wrought for me? Why? There’s but one thing for it: find out from her what’s going on.**

I love him, yet I am afraid to let him know.

I feel ill.

Kate =^..^= whose Miseries have been especially strong lately, perhaps this is why


* This was much ado over nothing and also we were two unpopular kids being unpopular at each other.
** Oh, God, I was melodramatic.

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