annotated at a disadvantage

First day back. Oh, gods. Neatly divided between “holy shit, this is awesome” and “jesus fucking gods, I can’t handle this”.

You handled that like a BOSS.

I love the fact that, um, everybody knows my name (cue Cheers theme). I love my theatre tech class, especially since we’re going to work on a show that’s still in development, and J– has brought in the writer himself. Must get in on the revisions. This is my chance to see how a show really comes together in the making, something I need to know if I’m going to be writing plays of my own and teaching how to do the same someday. Possibly.

You’re going to learn a lot from that guy. It won’t all be stagecraft.

Or it could just be the neatest damn opportunity in the world, and I’m just squeeing because this is right up my alley.

But. Oh, dear gods, is there ever a “BUT” attached. My WWII prof does not give you an A unless you have a 97% average or better, and she makes her tests goddamn hard on purpose. I can expect to write one major paper and at least two essays per test. This will kill my GPA, and so close to graduation, I’m not sure it’s a risk I want to take, so as fascinating as this subject matter is, I may look around for something totally easy to fill that requirement. I wanted to take Personal Money Management, but my mother pitched a fit; sucks to be her, because I’m going to go back and see if there’s an open section. It’s something useful and it’ll let me graduate with my GPA fairly intact.

What you actually did: Finagled credits out of your professors for the theatre work. You were smart not to overload. You were on the verge of burnout.

If you are on the double-locked filter, you will know the other half of the reason why today kind of hurt. Here’s a handy analogy for those of you who might be wondering: say you’re River, with all her reading capabilities, and you know your beloved Captain is going to get his butt kicked, emotionally, if he finally takes up with Inara. You know everyone’s rooting for them, but you can’t see the match actually working.

Ah, Livejournal. Where there were filters.

Take that and drop in three (3) failed relationships that you’ve seen up close and personal, including one of your own, where the people involved were just too damn different and one or both of them tried too hard to change.

…you’re going to see one more!

I believe love should be a hell of a lot easier than folks make it out to be, honestly. In keeping with the analogy, Mal should not have to set aside the fact that Inara is a Companion, with all that entails. It’s better he should keep flying. Maybe he will meet someone more suited to him at the next port-of-call. Once you start giving away pieces of yourself, the giving keeps going until one day, you don’t have any of you left.

Forgive me if I’m having trouble standing idly by, under those circumstances.

NO. NO. DO NOT MEDDLE. I REPEAT. DO NOT MEDDLE. Or as they put it on “Firefly”, TRAAAAAP.

So that was… technically yesterday. And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to come up with alternate courses to replace the one I’m probably going to have to drop. Son of a motherless goat.

Heh. I love that one.

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