Battlestar Galactica recap

[Yeah, and I don’t remember the name of the episode that aired that night. Sue me.]

Holy shit. Not only is Baltar reminding me of Jim Jones, but poor Chief has shaved his head and is listening to him while jumping rope. Oh, and the voice soothes Nicky.

Helo = made of win and love and peacemaking. And I think Kara needs to fly a little, to remember what she is beyond all this prophecy BS. Of course, she is not taking the opportunity to do that. She is, in fact, going crazier. I wonder if the DRADIS contact goes by Moby Dick?

Nope. It goes by Leoben, and boy, is it frakking with her mind.

Opening. By the way, Katee Sackhoff is one of TV Guide’s sexiest people this week. The photograph more than does her justice. She is the Goddess personified, strong and beautiful, with all the wisdom in the world behind her eyes.

I do have to ask: is missing out on Motorhead tickets really that much of a tragedy?

Back. Gaeta, you are looking sex-ay in that outfit. Long live action!Gaeta.

Whoa, Leoben’s lookin’ rough.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Good girl, Kara. Never let the bastard see you weak again.

All those sweaty pilots look alike; I’m assuming the one who spoke last was Helo. It’s more characteristic of him, anyway. What is bizarre is that Kara wants Leoben for a pet.

Note to Wardrobe: For fuck’s sake, give Chief back his hair. “How does she go from antidepressants to suicide?” Um. Although in this case he’s barking up the right tree (as opposed to barking mad).

Shut up, Tory. You’ve been drinking the Kool-Aid. Chief is not going to jump your purple-clad bones, so STOP CALLING HIM GALEN. *mumble* leave my boy alone.

Oh, dear. There’s Mr. Kara. Gaeta, honey, please stop making it sound like the man’s being cuckolded. I love how, despite knowing what she’s been through, Sam still plays possessive. You know it’s bad when I’m rooting for Leoben. I mean, I never liked Anders, but this time I think he’s going a leeetle far, nu?

Leoben in Kara’s brig. Six in Galactica’s. Nice set of parallels there.

Break. My phone is downstairs, and I am too lazy to get it. Le sigh.

Back. Mutiny! The alliance would be a decent idea, actually. Athena, you are dead stupid for letting the captain — the captain, who can throw you out the airlock — overhear your treason.

Tory. You are singlehandedly causing more chaos than the whole Cylon fleet. Shut UP and go AWAY. Also, Lee Adama — who argued on Baltar’s behalf — is not “nobody of influence”.

Chief, you know I love Baltar, but he’s kinda crazy right now and you’re vulnerable. Please step away before you catch it. Go with the nice one-eyed XO. He’s been where you are. And no, you are not allowed to throw it in his face.

Boy, I can’t wait until they find Earth. I sincerely hope they land in a time where Depeche Mode is available on mp3, so he can listen to “Blasphemous Rumors” and totally fucking agree.

Trashstar Demetrius, where folks is gettin’ blasted all to hell. Lovely.

Break. Hey, I almost forgot Anders was a Cylon. I guess his crazy, obsessive love for Kara kind of overrides his groupthink.

Back. Baltar, telling people not to clap? What is he on? I like that he’s trying to learn compassion and all, but he’s treading some dangerous waters. Chief ain’t a forgiving man. Plus, Chief didn’t like his wife all that much, as we found out last week. See? Extend a hand of peace, get choked half to death.

Oh, no, Chief. You don’t get a bullet to the brainpan (squish!). Although, if you have to, behind the ear works pretty well.

GO KARA. Beat the frak out of Leoben, because Leoben is a dirty frakking liar. And don’t kill him, because a live prisoner is that much more valuable. Plus, you’ve already killed this one enough.

…Kara Thrace, the Angel Moroni? WTF?

Uh, how do you get from “freak accident” to “we’re all gonna die”?

Break, as Helo beats sense into some dumbass airman.

Back. Chief remembers when he had hair. Baltar hides his in an emo hoodie. Good boy, Gaius. Asking forgiveness is the way to go when you piss off a grieving man. I want to believe that this is genuine, from him. I want to believe that Gaius is becoming a man of faith because he wants to change for the better, even if it means he’s nuts. I need to redeem this character because I hate the thought that people are irredeemable.

“I have committed unconscionable crimes, and I have been offered a chance at redemption.” Because he knows he’s done wrong. And that’s what got through to Chief, because they clasp hands and make a momentary peace.

Athena? STFU. Helo’s doing what he thinks is right. You know. His captain’s bidding? I like that Gaeta’s taking the diplomat role, rather than the “let’s piss off Kara so more of us get beat the fuck up” route. Helo asks as well, just to be sure, and then refuses — in a much more polite way than anyone has so far. Kara understands. She relieves him. Trouble is, I don’t think she’ll find anyone else to take his place. Hoo, boy, that brig’s going to be full-up.

And of course, since she’s wildly outnumbered, she’s next to be relieved. The flowchart must go thusly: Is captain batshit insane? IF no, THEN follow orders. IF yes, relieve her of duty.

…crap. Now I am thinking in code.

Credits! Woo.

NEXT WEEK: Kara on a Cylon ship, Sam shooting people in the ankles to keep Kara from getting airlocked her own damn self, and a cold, wet benediction.


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